I had a lot of dreams last night that totally turn me off from touching anyone, but I won't go into that because they are getting blurry and were generally about sexual inadequacy and contempt, so what is there really to go with that, just more of the eternal conundrum. I am bashful, yet I want both panther love and security. It is like a triple contradiction. I want to be a video game, a cat, and a dog all at the same time.

Another dream I had though was that me and Matthew worked at the lottery, and we wanted to quit our jobs but weren't allowed to, so we had to be sneaky about it, especially because there were video cameras everywhere.